


Adrien's Intro to Fanfiction

by CQueen



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: F/M, Growing Up, Hilarity, Misunderstandings, Sex Education, Teenage Dorks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:53:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26916172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CQueen/pseuds/CQueen
Summary: Adrien has vaguely heard about fanfiction-from Chloe-but never actually read any.  Then he finds out that people out there are writing fanfiction about his beloved Ladybug and so of course he has to look some up.  Especially when he finds out that there are ones about him as Cat Noir AND Ladybug as a couple.Unfortunately no one warned him about checking ratings and the tags before reading.Poor Adrien.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Comments: 16
Kudos: 115





	1. Holy Fanfiction, Cat Noir

Disclaimer: Thanks so much for reading, I hope you enjoy this latest oneshot and please, please let me know what you think because I love to hear from you guys! Also, obviously, I own nothing but the original characters and the plot itself. Thankies.

Also probably all of you are too young to get the reference imbedded in the chapter title. If anyone does besides me...thank you for not making me feel so old heh.

Holy Fanfiction, Cat Noir

Stretching his arms out above his head Adrien winced at the sounds his back made in reaction to the new movements. He had definitely been hunched over his keyboard for way too long, he acknowledged grimly. He was sure to pay for it tomorrow, too. But at least his homework was done for the weekend already, freeing it up for him to spend time with his friends if the Fates were kind. Possibly helping them with their own homework, Adrien thought with a rueful laugh as he continued to move his upper body in ways meant to loosen muscles-which mostly just pissed them off. Crap. How long had he been working?

A glance at the time in the corner of his main computer screen made him wince. Damn.

Oh well. Cest la vie. And he wouldn't even mind if he did end up spending the rest of his weekend helping his friends with their own painful workload. He actually liked it. It made him feel useful; like he was giving back to them. They were pretty much his only source of affection and support these days after all. They had no idea, really, how much they meant to him. Helping them with their studies was the least he could do.

"Though it is a little pathetic, me spending my Friday night doing homework like this. I'm a failure as a sixteen-year-old man. Who is also talking to himself like a complete loser." Adrien tacked on, absently looking around for Plagg in case he could pretend that was who he'd been talking to instead. Nope. Probably still on the couch in a cheese related food coma. The glutton.

Rolling his eyes over that Adrien turned his attempt back to the screen in front of him, double checking that everything was saved properly before exiting the program with a sigh of relief mixed with muscle related twinges.

Now what?

Maybe go to bed, though he wasn't that tired yet. Read a book, maybe? Or hey, he hadn't checked out Alya's Ladybug Blog in a while, Adrien realized. Nothing cheered him up quite like discussing how awesome his lady was with others in the chatroom. Or looking at the pictures people snapped and posted of her. There might be some new ones to add to his collection after that last battle two days ago.

With renewed energy-even though the voice in the back of his mind reminded Adrien that this was only going to make him more stiff and sore tomorrow-Adrien went to his bookmarked sites and settled in to enjoy some Ladybug time.

And he did, two new pictures added to his Ladybug folder before Adrien left the pics section and went to the message boards, always interested to see who they were speculating Ladybug actually was, discussions on her powers, the rest of her team, etc etc-What's that?

Pausing, Adrien frowned and then clicked on it, leaning forward to read the original post, which was written under Alya's username.

Apparently a fan in America had just informed her that some site called 'Archive of Our Own', or 'AO3' for short, had started allowing people to post something called Fanfiction on their site. Fanfiction about Ladybug. And there were links to various ones Alya had read and was recommending to people.

Wait. He'd heard of fanfiction. Where had he...Chloe!

It was a dim memory-he tried to block a lot of his interactions with Chloe out for obvious reasons-but hadn't she been in an uproar like a year, year and a half ago because she'd stumbled across some fanfiction involving him? She'd said something about people writing stories about him dating some singer or actress. That people did that for celebrities and fictional characters they liked online.

Chloe had claimed to be outraged on his behalf-rather than just furious at the idea of him dating someone else-and had said he should have his father sue the site or something. He'd just shrugged it off because it hadn't seemed like that big a deal. Creepy, yeah, since obviously these people didn't know him and them making up stories about him wasn't okay...but it was probably nicer stories than the ones the tabloids made up about people all the time too.

So people were writing stories about Ladybug now? Were there some about him, too, as Cat Noir?

Intrigued over the possibilities Adrien decided to click on one of the links, see what there was to see.

The story in question wasn't that long, a couple thousand words and in English, but it was pretty cute. A retelling of one of their battles with Mr. Pigeon. Which meant no real danger with plenty of absurdity and cause for amusement. The thoughts the writer attributed to Ladybug-well there was no way to know how accurate they were-but it was mostly in character. She wouldn't be upset by it, Adrien didn't think.

Scrolling back up to the top after he was done reading Adrien clicked on the link he thought would take him back to the main Ladybug page...which it did. Revealing that there were apparently a lot of stories out there about his lady already.

The first one wasn't in a language he recognized, and the second...a story about Ladybug and Rena Rouge as a couple? Seriously? That was...

Mind not going there, Adrien told himself sternly, skipping over that one pointedly.

Hey, this one featured him, too!

Apparently this was a oneshot-one chapter, maybe?-and it was about him and Ladybug enjoying a romantic evening while enjoying a midnight viewing of the Eiffel Tower from a nearby building.

Seriously? Did people write romantic stories about him and Ladybug? How had he not known about this?! Where had this been all his life?!

Clicking on it immediately Adrien's romantic heart was immediately immersed in the elegant description of his city and the way the author made Ladybug sound so beautiful and himself so handsome and charming. If only Ladybug thought the same!

Only is this story she did, Adrien belatedly realized, the written versions of them flirting playfully with each other in the story. And wow, what he would not GIVE to have Ladybug flirt with him. Lean against him and put her head on his shoulder. Kiss him on the cheek.

The mouth.

Oh.

Cheeks pinking up a little, not that he was complaining in the slightest, Adrien kept reading as the writer described a heated, passionate kiss between him and Ladybug. With tongue!

Reading about making out with the girl of your dreams was weird-but in a really, really good way.

)

Five Minutes into the Fanfic

"Yeah. Her costume does not have a handy zipper like that. I've looked. If it weren't for the fact that she'd probably slap me if I asked how she-wait...why is Ladybug-HOLY SHIT!"

Adrien tried, but it was really, really hard to process the fact that in the story he-as Cat Noir-had just grabbed this magical zipper to Ladybug's superhero suit and pulled it down. To her waist. With his teeth.

Had done that and been allowed to KEEP his teeth.

And that was shocking enough...but it just got worse-BETTER as he compulsively continued to read as his brains were scrambled and vivid, erotic pictures formed in his head. And he had a great imagination. It came from being an only child without a lot of other kids to play with.

Though he'd never used his imagination-okay, that was a lie. But this was...so much hotter than anything his imagination had EVER come up with. He needed ice water, stat. Also-

"Mon Dieu. I'm-Cat Noir is-Ladybug's-my tongue is not like a cat in Cat Noir form! And if it was like a cat that wouldn't feel good, it would probably really hurt her-her nip-Fuck!"

Slapping a hand over his mouth Adrien went very still, hoping really hard that he hadn't woken Plagg up because if he did his kwami would want to know what he was yelling about and he did NOT want to have a discussion with Plagg about how he'd just read about his alter ego-who was technically, sorta Plagg too in a weird way-licking at Ladybug's bre-upper chest area.

Ladybug was not that big busted either, Adrien told himself when his thoughts returned to the screen, trying to distract himself and prevent his mind from going in other, more dangerous directions. Not that there was anything wrong with any part of Ladybug's body, she was perfect, but there was no way her breasts were the size of-nevermind. Nevermind. The point was total inaccuracy there. As was them being naked under their costumes. They were not naked!

Also-purely hypothetically-if he and Ladybug were to have...sex...while in superhero form-would that be considered a foursome seeing as their kwamis were a part of them at that point?

"Fuck. I did not need that idea in my head at ALL."

Slapping his palm against his forehead Adrien groaned, then tilted his head in the direction of the white screen in front of him. The white screen full of words that, if he focused on them again, would probably continue to describe he and Ladybug having sex...for anyone to read.

"No. No, I shouldn't read this." Adrien told himself sternly. "You'll never be able to look her in the eyes again if you do. You already act like enough of an idiot around her without your brain short-circuiting even more. Not to mention our costume leaves NOTHING to the imagination! Do you want to have to explain THAT to Ladybug?!"

Heck no.

But he also wanted to keep reading.

Would he and Ladybug actually, you know, go all the way in this story? Was that allowed online?

Wait. Scratch that. Of course it was. This was the internet after all. He was sheltered, yes, but even he was aware of the stuff that showed up often in his Junk Mail or sometimes got advertised when he looked up manga or anime. Or...other stuff.

He shouldn't. He really, really shouldn't. It was a bad idea. A horrible idea. Plagg could wake up at any minute too. It was a miracle he hadn't already.

Damn it. He was totally going to keep reading.

Bad idea. Worst idea ever.

Adrien lasted about three minutes before he caved...and proceeded to have his mind blown all over again. Not to mention the fact that all the blood in his head drained down to fill up another part of his anatomy as he read about him undressing Ladybug. Putting her legs over his shoulders and used his mouth and tongue to make her scream and gasp and beg for more while he-

Fuck.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

He was imagining it now. Imagining it was real and what it would be like to be able to kiss her, touch her, make Ladybug beg him for more of his touch instead of push him away. To be able to touch her bare skin, to feel her skin against his own...Hell. To have her belong to him as he so completely belonged to him.

Didn't it just figure...only in fiction was this possible.

But not even that thought was enough to dampen Adrien's new mood, especially as he kept reading and imagining and being right there with the fake versions of him and Ladybug when it came to heat and arousal. So much heat and arousal and he was a teenage boy and this was really hot and...and...

He was done for.

So done for. On a number of levels.

)

Sunday Afternoon

So Saturday night Adrien had agreed to come over to Marinette's place to help her, Nino, and Alya with their homework. Nino had called him and Adrien had-in his sleep deprived, brain melted state-hadn't even really processed what he was agreeing to. He wouldn't have even remembered the conversation the next day if Plagg hadn't been there to remind him about it. He'd had to text Nino to ask about the agreed upon time because he didn't remember it.

Wouldn't have remembered because stupid, STUPID him had spent hours upon hours reading fanfiction all weekend. He had so, so many regrets. Especially since it had taken way longer than it should have for him to process the fact that he could be warned ahead of time about what kind of content he was about to read by reading the warning thingies that came after the title and before the summary on the main Ladybug page. Those were very, very important.

He'd learned a bunch of new words this weekend. Many of which he'd had to look up online. He'd seen and read things he could never unlearn and see.

God help him.

Though at least he'd had enough brain power left to know that he needed to erase his browsing history every time so that if his father got into his computer-or got Nathalie to do it-they wouldn't see him looking up sex related things like a nymphomaniac. Though he'd kinda want to see their faces if they did.

Actually...no. Thinking about sex and either of those two in the same thought...

Adrien shuddered. Time to think about something else. Like the stupidity of him doing this study date.

Really, he should cancel. They'd be able to muddle through things on their own without him. Probably. Only...maybe not? The sub they'd had for the past two weeks could have made a play by play commentary of the last Marvel movie seem boring and only worth sleeping through. He made your brain just shut off automatically, like Professor Binns from 'Harry Potter'. Heck, if it weren't for the fact that his father had hired some new tutors last summer to give Adrien a head start on his school work-heaven forbid he cut back on his modelling and 'required extracurriculars during the school year so that he could concentrate on his studies-Adrien probably wouldn't have gotten his own work done so easily.

Crap. He had to help them. Or at least try. It would be a distraction, at least.

And help him avoid temptation.

Grunting noises from the front seat had Adrien looking at his bodyguard questioningly-the gorilla meeting his gaze in the review mirror while giving him a pointed look.

Oh.

Looking around Adrien realized that they'd arrived...and maybe had been parked for a while. Oops.

"Sorry. I'll call you when we're done."

Manly grunt and nod.

All right then. Time to go. Oh-and undoing his seatbelt first would probably help.

Grabbing his messenger bag once he managed that Adrien slid the strap over his shoulder and then opened the car door, letting himself out and actually remembering to close the door behind him. Score. His brain was starting to function again. Surprise.

Sigh.

Adjusting the sunglasses he'd put on to hide his tired, bloodshot eyes from Nathalie and his bodyguard Adrien opted to leave them in place for the time being and instead slowly made his way to the back entrance to Marinette's house, not having to wait long before the door opened to reveal Marinette's father in the doorway.

"Hello, Adrien. It's been too long. Come in, come in."

"Thank you, Sir."

"I'm afraid your study buddies aren't here just yet." Mr. Dupain began as Adrien stepped inside. "Traffic is horribly backed up in Alya's neighborhood because of a protest she didn't know was happening. So many protests in the world these past few years. Needed ones." Marinette's dad added with a wink in Adrien's direction before he turned around to close the door behind them. "She and Nino were stuck on a bus, she said, but they called and said they would be here as soon as they could catch another. Marinette was babysitting for a friend of her mother's and apparently the mother got caught in the traffic jam as well. She should be here in ten minute or so."

"No worries." More time for his brain to hopefully focus on the task at hand. And him to review his own finished homework again to remind him what he was supposed to be teaching the others.

Mr. Dupain led the way to the living room, telling Adrien to go ahead and take a seat while he went and got the snacks he'd prepared for them.

Marinette's dad was so nice, Adrien thought as he dropped down onto the couch, setting his bag beside the couch with a thump. Why couldn't his dad be like Marinette's? He had so much he wanted to talk about and get off his chest, but he and his dad did not have that kind of relationship. Never had.

And talking about it with his guy friends...the idea turned Adrien's stomach. He was already so different from his friends. So behind when it came to what his peers were into and what was popular. He barely had time for a social life and-

Sighing, Adrien took off the sunglasses and set them aside, rubbing his hands over his abused eyes as he tried to remind himself that he wasn't thinking about this stuff now. He needed to get it together.

"Are you all right? Headache?"

Looking up from his hunched over position Adrien blinked to see Marinette's father standing nearby, a concerned look on his face as he walked over to set the tray he held on the nearby table, his gaze never leaving Adrien's face.

"I'm fine." Was Adrien's automatic response. Habit.

"I don't mean to pry-or call you a liar-but you don't look fine to me. Did something happen? If you're not feeling up to doing homework with the others, they'll understand."

"No. No I...I could use the distraction."

"Distractions can help, yes. Is there anything I can do to help, though? I'm a fairly good listener, I think. I would like to help, if I can."


	2. Sex, The Final Frontier

Sex, The Final Frontier

He was sleep deprived, mildly traumatized, and very stressed out, but Adrien still had enough working braincells-probably-to know that he shouldn't talk about what was actually bothering him with Marinette's dad. Her dad probably didn't even know what fanfiction was. Though if he did...God, that would be even worse, Adrien realized, his mind trying and mostly failing to wrap around this latest horror. If someone his dad's age knew more about that sort of thing than he did...well then how truly pathetic and naïve was he? Sex, yeah. It was a given that the much older man would know way more than he would since Marinette would have never come into existence if-nevermind. For the sake of his sanity and being able to look Marinette and her parents in the face again, Adrien was determined not to let his mind wander down that path. Especially given the scenarios he could now picture thanks to the education he'd gotten this weekend. Nope. Mind not going there. Ever.

"Whatever you tell me would remain between us. On my word."

Crap. Tempting. So very, very tempting.

"It's...complicated. And personal."

"So I gathered. It's been quite a long time since I was a teenager, but I do remember it well enough to know I was thankful when it ended. So much drama and heartache. Wanting to grow up, even as we long to remain a child. A very stressful time."

Resolve weakening, his desperate need for parenting winning, Adrien found himself asking Marinette's father if he knew what fanfiction was as a last-ditch effort to save himself from spilling his guts. Surely he'd say no and then-

"I've heard of it, yes. Just last week, actually. My Marinette was quite upset about it, after reading stories that had been written about people she knew without their permission. I would imagine, given your popularity and career...a great many stories have been written about you online and in the papers. That would be very upsetting. Hurtful."

Marinette's dad practically radiated sympathy and understanding. Which Adrien would have appreciated more if he hadn't been more hung up on what he'd said.

"Mari's read fanfiction?"

The older man nodded. "She said that Alya asked her to read some of the Ladybug fanfics to get her opinion on what to recommend on her blog."

Wait...what?

Alya had exposed Marinette to fanfiction? Sweet, innocent Mari? What the hell had Alya been thinking? Marinette was NOT Alya. Alya was like a duck and water. Everything slid off her back and Adrien had seen how she liked to tease Marinette about boys and dating and even sex a couple of times. Alya had no business leading Marinette down the rabbit hole of depravity and sin that was fanfiction.

They were going to have WORDS about this. Ruining him for life was one thing, Alya had no business doing that to Marinette.

"It's that bad?"

"It's that bad. So bad. Some of it traumatizingly bad."

"I see. Well...we'll-ah-talk to Mari about it, then. I'm sure Alya made sure the ones she showed her weren't too bad. Traumatizing?"

He should probably reassure the man, but he liked Mari's dad too much to lie to him. And he was too tired to be convincing, obviously, so he just nodded. Plus if Marinette needed therapy her parents would be the ones paying, after all.

"I'm sorry the stories about you are that bad. People-a lot of it is probably jealousy. People who wish they were like you and led your life."

That...that did it. That was the straw that broke the camel's back.

It just all came blurting out.

"Some of it was-like they had me cheating! Cheating on her. I would never, ever do that! Or leaving her when she was pregnant with my kid or being abusive or-that's not who I am. I would never be that man! And I get that they're just stories, but they aren't just stories because it's ME. It's my name and face and...and the person they're describing isn't me! None of them were truly me. And on top of having to worry about the fact that that's how people see me, half of them have turned me into this sex god and I've never had sex! I don't know anything, and it seems like I'm supposed to, and I don't! Even when I'm a virgin in the stories I'm still a sex god! Am I supposed to know? Were there classes I missed or some secret man society? Is my dad supposed to tell me these things because if that's the case I'm screwed. Beyond fucked. My mother gave me the talk and then when puberty really started to hit my dad gave me a book and told me if I had any questions to ask our family doctor. Our family doctor! He's like a hundred years old and still gives me candy when I visit! And then reminds me to brush my teeth afterwards every time! I can't ask him! I don't need those mental images. I'm already scarred enough! And I feel stupid, and dumb, and like everyone knows this stuff but me, and I hate it! Hate it!"

Panting for air as he recovered from that word vomit Adrien could feel his cheeks burn and wished in that moment that he could literally burst into flames and end up as nothing but ash on the floor. It would be preferable to living with what he'd just done.

Leaning forward and putting his face in his hands, unable to look in Mr. Dupain's direction, Adrien groaned, knowing sweet death wasn't coming and he was going to have to-

"It's normal. Adrien. All that you're feeling and thinking...it's normal."

What?

And then the seat beside him was compressing and Adrien realized in shock that Marinette's father had taken a seat beside him. That the sudden weight on his shoulder was the man's hand resting on it. Giving it a comforting squeeze.

"There aren't-well there are classes, probably-but not-it's not." Marinette's dad cleared his throat, loudly. Was possibly blushing or making faces too, not that Adrien could see since he was very determinedly keeping his face in his hands.

"Unless things have changed a great deal since I was in school you're only taught the bare basics about sex. Things like how babies are made and diseases you can catch and-the basics. And whatever your friends tell you-you should know that most of them are just as clueless and afraid and freaked out as you. They just hide it better, perhaps. We learn from older brothers and magazines and things we hear from our friends that are often as fictitious as these stories you read."

Another shoulder squeeze.

"Adrien...you shouldn't be embarrassed or ashamed that you don't know these things. In fact, I think it speaks well of you. With your looks, fame, and money-I would imagine getting girls to pay attention to you is not hard. I know Mari has complained many times about how Chloe Bourgeois throws herself at you. You could be having sex if you wanted to, no?"

That...okay. He did get hit on a lot at fashion shows and afterparties and there were a few girls in school who'd insinuated-yeah. He could be having sex if he wanted. But he didn't want to have sex with anyone other than Ladybug and-and regardless it would be crappy sex because he didn't know what to do!

Though the fanfiction HAD given him some ideas. A lot of ideas.

"There is someone special?"

He nodded before he could think better of it.

"Does she feel the same?"

Head shake.

"I'm sorry. Young love, it's a painful thing. Perhaps she will change her mind in the future. Women have been known to do that. Often."

It was a weak laugh. But a laugh. And being able to laugh about the ridiculousness of the situation he was in made Adrien feel good enough to lift his head and turn it to look in Mr. Dupain's direction.

"That's what I'm hoping."

"'The future has not been written', to quote a very old movie you've probably never seen. But it's true. And when the time comes with a special girl...as long as you show care and pay attention...you'll figure things out."

Adrien highly doubted that. Though he appreciated the attempt to bolster his flagging, nearly dead self confidence.

"I'll tell you what, I'll give you the same advice-or as best I remember it-that my friend Louis and I were given by his older brother Hugo. Who had the sort of luck with women we mere mortals can only dream about."

Perking up a little, Adrien allowed himself to feel a glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe, he was going to get at least some idea what to expect and do that was based on reality and not fiction. If this Hugo had been so popular, there had to be a reason, right? Unless he was just that good looking. Being gorgeous definitely made up for a lot of other deficiencies, he'd noticed, to a lot of people.

"Before I tell you...you should know that Hugo was very into track. He did and still does marathons last I heard. So he explained it with a running metaphor."

"A running metaphor?"

"Bear with me. It actually makes a lot of sense and was very helpful. We both thanked him profusely because we were, like you, out to sea on many things when it came to women." A rueful laugh. "Not that I'm not still out to sea on many things.""

"But it gets better?"

"In some areas, yes."

Judging by the look Marinette's dad was giving him...Adrien was going to go out on a limb and assume not a lot of areas. Damn.

)

"So Hugo-he was about five years older than us-told Louis and I that we should think of sex as doing a marathon with our partner. And as anyone who has ever run a marathon will tell you, training is key. You have to work up to it, taking things slow at first while learning from each other. Some are faster than others. Some prefer to run the course a certain way. A good partner is encouraging, understanding, and does not rush the other before they are ready. Push too hard, too fast, no one wins. No one is happy. And there might be injuries. Leave your partner behind, and perhaps you pass the finish line, but that's a hollow victory. And you lose the partner. Yes, one will most likely cross the line before the other. But so long as that one does their best to encourage the other than that doesn't matter. And once you've crossed that line a few times...then it stops being so much work and becomes a lot more enjoyable. Especially if you train a lot before the big race."

Huh. Okay. Not what he was expecting but...that actually made some sense to him. Training beforehand-foreplay. Foreplay seemed a lot less scary than the actual sex part. And if he was really good at the first part, well than not being so great at the other part right away-maybe the girl would cut him some slack? Maybe?

"And you already have a very valuable tool at your disposal." Marinette's father added, breaking into Adrien's thoughts.

"My looks?"

A deep belly laugh. "That helps, yes. But I meant your fencing, actually."

"How does my fencing help?"

"You've been taught, trained, to pay attention to body language. That's a very important skill when it comes to these things."

Huh. Yeah. He had had that training. His instructors had been all about body language and learning to read your opponents. Like obsessive about it. And don't even get him started on Kagami and her mom on the subject.

"Feel better?"

Straightening up and meeting the other man's gaze, Adrien felt confident enough to smile a little.

"Yeah. I'm...wow, I'm sorry I did that to you."

Adrien's cheeks went red again as he remembered how he'd unloaded on the man. He might have even sworn. His mind was going a little hazy on some of the details.

It was maybe like childbirth, Adrien's brain suggested helpfully. The trauma was too much for his brain to handle. Though any woman who'd given birth would probably castrate him for suggesting that the two things were in any way comparable. And the castration would probably be semi deserved in a lot of cases. Depending on the amount of drugs taken beforehand.

And he did not want to think about childbirth right now.

Though that was a good way to kill his libido, which was good to know. And remind Adrien about how having sex early could come back to bite you in the ass. There'd been a couple teenage pregnancy fanfics that had made that very, very clear.

Adrien groaned just thinking about it.

"Oh, now. None of that. Really. Embarrassing questions are part of being a parent. And if your father can't answer any of your questions, well I am happy to stand in for him. You're one of my Mari's most valued friends. That makes you important to me, too."

Oh crap. Oh fuck. If he cried he was going to-

A big hand on his head, ruffling his hair. "You're too hard on yourself. Don't be."

Looking over at him, there was only one thing to say in Adrien's opinion. "Mari is so right. You ARE the best dad in the world."

In reaction Marinette's dad stared back at Adrien while looking a little misty eyed himself, both of them beyond relieved when the moment was broken by the sound of pounding footsteps and Marinette calling out the question of whether or not her friends were there yet and if she had time to change.

Loudly clearing of his throat Mr. Dupain got to his feet, calling back to her that Adrien was here, but not Alya and Nino. And if she needed to change then go ahead, they'd be fine. He'd keep playing host for her.

Popping her head in Marinette gave a very awkward wave in Adrien's direction. And hid the rest of her body from view as she used the wall as a shield.

"Hi. Ah...I'll be RIGHT back. I-the baby-yeah...I need a fresh shirt. Be right back!"

Chuckling as his daughter disappeared from view-there was a loud thump that indicated Marinette might have run into something in her run to get to her room before they saw whatever the baby had done to her shirt-Mr. Dupain grinned adoringly in that direction before giving himself a shake and turning back to smile at Adrien.

"Thank you. For what you said. We parents, well we can use all the positive reviews we can get from our teenagers."

Sorta afraid of what he might say or do if he tried to talk, Adrien settled for nodding back shyly.

"Well then...let's talk about something else, shall we? What we talked about before-that is man stuff."

"Man stuff." Adrien agreed with a relieved sigh.

)

A Few Hours Later

Fresh from a hot shower Adrien decided to get dressed for bed even though that was a few hours off still. He wasn't going anywhere, and the odds of someone in the house needing him for something were pretty much nil. And yeah, Ladybug could call him about a rampaging akuma somewhere, but in that case it really didn't matter what he was wearing since all anyone would see was his kwami disguise. Which continued to defy all logical explanation. One, how did a mystical creature that shouldn't even exist become a superhero costume? And two, how was it that said costume appeared over his clothes-and those clothes just magically disappeared and then reappeared when he didn't need the protective suit anymore. It made no logical sense.

Plagg was no help either. The kwami just shrugged off the question and changed the subject. Usually to cheese. Adrien was pretty sure that his kwami would marry cheese if that were possible. No. Scratch that. He'd want to eat the cheese, not marry it. And if he did marry it he'd still eat the cheese.

Yeah...his brain might still be a little sleep deprived and messed up.

But he was still doing better thanks to Marinette's dad. Adrien knew he owed the other man, big time. He needed to do something nice for him. Something more than just reassuring him that he was an excellent parent. He'd ask Marinette about it when he saw her next. Or text her.

Nodding in satisfaction over that plan Adrien walked over to his computers, there being one thing he wanted to do before he watched some TV before turning in for the night.

Alya's blog.

Logging in Adrien went in search of the post where she'd listed the Ladybug fanfics she was recommending to their fellow Ladybug fans. He'd realized-belatedly-that he should go on there and warn others who had yet to be traumatized of the pitfalls and importance of reading the tags and paying attention to the ratings and warnings. He was a superhero after all. Saving people was his business.

Finding it easily, Adrien scrolled down and-oh.

There was a video clip and it was labeled as being an official message from Ladybug. What the heck?

Immediately Adrien clicked on it.

The background was an ordinary brick wall, and the angle of the camera made it clear that Ladybug was probably recording this herself, on her phone.

"Hey there, Everyone." Ladybug waved a hand at the camera. "I hope you're all doing amazing and thanks so much for all your love and support on this site. It means a lot to Cat Noir and I. I know-thanks to this site-that a lot of you have started writing stories about us, and I wanted to say that that's really flattering. I was completely shocked when I found out about them. So I wanted to say thank you...and also remind you that these are real people you are writing about, so please keep that in mind. People who have been akumatized are victims, not bad guys, and my fellow team of superheroes, especially my partner Cat Noir, are the absolute BEST and I COULDN'T do my job protecting Paris without them."

A pause to let that sink in.

"And to those reading these stories...please be respectful, leave reviews, and pay attention to the ratings and the warnings authors put in the description when it comes to content. This is really, REALLY, important. Have a good night, Bug Out."

That was the end of the video.

And sitting there two things went around and around in Adrien's head.

One...Ladybug was the most amazing woman in the world and he was going to love her until the day he died.

Two...OH MY GOD! LADYBUG HAD READ THE FANFICTION HE'D READ!

He was never going to be able to look her in the eyes again. Dammit!

He was so, so screwed. Sigh.

The End


End file.
